I do think I need to get more regular here… that makes it sound like I need added fibre – which I likely do. But – I need to make working on this page a habit and practice writing here more. However – this is a start and we all must begin somewhere.

I’m still trying to decide what this site is and what to do with it. Should I allow it to grow in its own meandering fashion? I’m rather fond of meandering but I do see how it can detour momentum.

Or do I get obsessive and control every detail? I probably should if I’m ever going to get anything done – but I’m afraid that’s not in my nature.

Ideally – I should find a happy medium but I’m sure I will continue to lurch forward between the extremes. I usually do.

To begin – as poetry month skids to an end – I wanted to share a couple of poems. One I’ve posted on Facebook but I’m trying not to go there right now. And the other I had submitted to a publication but they don’t want it so I’ll throw it up here.

Poem 1 (the formatting keeps getting messed up but I’ve no energy to fuss right now)

Hold Up the Sky

When you try to hold up the sky – at first – you think: This is easy. It’s nothing but air.
What you do not see is the weight of eons and the heavy threads of dreams,
You think you can hold it lightly – carefully balanced and feather-light on the tips of your fingers.

I can do this – you think. I am strong – my muscles firm from the lifting of careworn years and swirls of tears.
The sky is heavier than you imagine. It contains centuries of storms.
It holds legions of prayers – all caught between the holy notes of almost songs.

When you try to hold up the sky – your fingers can only grasp a second before

the insubstantial
weight of air
pulls you
out and
forward
out and
up
into
the velvet black
of galaxy sprinkled
with the
dreams
of
stars.

And Poem #2

More Than Fine

You’ll be fine, they said.
Quit complaining – what could possibly be wrong?
Get some exercise, try a diet, and don’t forget to journal.

You’ll be fine, they said.
You’re too loud, too weird, you don’t make sense
Make yourself smaller, don’t be so awkward, it’s not that hard.

You’ll be fine, they said.
Just be yourself, get a coach, cleanse your space,
Live life to the fullest, go shopping, and smile!

You’ll be fine, they said.
Your thoughts don’t matter and your feelings are extreme.
We’re all anxious – just accept you’re depressed, and

You’ll be fine, they said.
Here’s a drug that you’ll love – it’ll take away the trauma,
numb the tears and soak up the pain. Just comply and

You’ll be fine.

I said
No.

I know my bones
I slip in my skin
I sit on my brain
and tickle my chin.
I will laugh

I said
I will dance
I will play despite what you say
I can no longer bury my voice
I will sing, I will scream, I will rage
I will be silent no more

I said
So I dance in the day
and scribble at night
Sing my soul to the stars and
skip through my scars.

Someday
I will be more than fine
I said.

Happy meanderings…